As men in his childhood taught him that a “real” man does not let another man impose on him, Victor Rios grew up trying to emulate the version of a man he was led to believe was most true. Years of life slowly eroded that belief and exposed the realities of masculinity and the effect it can have on both men and women. Now, he examines how dismantling that belief that a man needs to be tough, angry and violent to command respect in others can positively change both them and those around them. Dr. Victor Rios is Dean of Social Sciences and Professor of Sociology at the University of California, Santa Barbara. He received his Ph.D. at the University of California Berkeley in 2005. Using his personal experience of living on the streets, dropping out of school, and being incarcerated as a juvenile—along with his research findings—he has developed interventions for marginalized students aimed at promoting personal transformation and civic engagement. He is also the author of six books including Let’s Be Real, Man: Masculinity in a Culture of Violence. Dr. Rios has had the honor of meeting President Obama and advising his administration on gun violence and policing. He is the subject of the documentary film The Pushouts (thepushouts.com). This talk was given at a TEDx event using the TED conference format but independently organized by a local community. Learn more at https://www.ted.com/tedx