Good Evening President, First Lady, Ladies & Gentlemen, my name is Mohammad from SUN TV. Welcome to the White House Correspondent's Dinner.

The last time you saw a Muslim here was Hasan Minhaj,
Hasan (peace be on him) is the name for one of the 2 grandsons of Prophet Mohammad (peace be on him)
Hussain (peace be on him) is the other grandson and collectively they are the Leaders of the Youth of Paradise, Hussain (pbuh) which is also the middle name of President Barack Obama,
Didn't he sign an Executive Order to close Guantanamo Bay in 2009?
There are still 37 detainees there right now.
Dios mío (cuban spanish Goodness Me)

Did you hear about the reporter who asked Obama a hard question? Neither have I!
Obama's stay at The White House is typical of black people's housing in the USA, Renting in social housing from a White landlord before being kicked out after 8 years,
Do you know how Obama proposed to Michelle? He got down on bended knee and said "I don't wanna be Obama self.
I thought when he was in term, I would see a Nissan Altima, weekly garden parties on the North Lawn, smell of fried chicken throughout the house, loud rap music playing until midnight, bringing down the local house prices within a quarter mile radius...
Hey, all you black folk laughing at that, just remember it's only since 1944 that black reporters were allowed to attend this event, let that sink in,
For all you white ladies laughing at the black folk, it's only 1962 since women were allowed to attend this event, think about that for a while,
What is Obama’s favourite TV show? Game of Drones.
Anyway Obama is a complicated and nuanced character, he's not just black and white,
Speaking of black and white affairs apart from this White House Correspondent's Dinner,
What's black and white and red all over?
A penguin with a sunburn,

Talking of someone who has a permanent tan, Donald Trump,
What is the difference between Trump and a flying pig? The letter F
I thought when he was in term, I would see the White House coloured Gold, 18 hole golf course on the South Lawn, McDonalds drive through thru in the South portico, casino in the oval office & a large neon "Trump" sign on the front door,
What did Trump say when he heard a Mexican man wanted to be an American Fireman? No way Hose A.
When China built the Great Wall, the Mongols invaded them and founded the Yuan dynasty. With Trump building his wall, will the Mexicans invade the US and found the Juan dynasty?
He said recently he has a great relationship with all the Blacks…but I think he was referring to “The All Blacks” the New Zealand Rugby team,
The Donald deported a printer because it didn’t have papers
How do Mexicans feel about Trump’s wall? – They’ll get over it, but not to attend a Trump Rally for sure,

Speaking about Trump Rallies, Joe Bidens’s hair is so white, it tried to punch me at a Trump Rally,
I thought that he would convert the Oval office into a Bingo hall & install a stairlift on the Grand staircase.
Joe Biden had a meeting with the cabinet today, he also spoke to the bookcase and argued with the desk.
He is like a web browser with 19 tabs open, 17 are frozen and he doesn't know where the music is coming from
Why does Joe Biden call women muffins?
Cause muffins backwards is sniffum.

From the current President, to the 3rd President - Thomas Jefferson.
He had a 1764 English translation of The Holy Quran, which is the holy book of the religion of Islam, now residing in the Library of Congress. It’s the same book which Republican Keith Ellison, who was America’s first Muslim member of the body, used for his 2007 swearing-in.
America has lately had a complicated history with Islam, from Middle East Invasions to Muslim country bans and everything in-between. This evening, let’s break down barriers and I beg your indulgence to allow me to read to you the First Chapter of The Holy Quran translated in English.
Chapter 1: The Opening
1. In the Name of Allah,
2. the All-beneficent, the All-merciful.
3. All praise belongs to Allah, Lord of all the worlds,
4. the All-beneficent, the All-merciful,
5. Master of the Day of Retribution.
6. You [alone] do we worship, and to You [alone] do we turn for help.
7. Guide us on the straight path, the path of those whom You have blessed —such as have not incurred Your wrath, nor are astray.

Look behind me, nothing says quality than a canvas screen of the White House, with creases,
it has more wrinkles on it than Nancy Pelosi & Hilary Clinton combined,
Washington D.C., It took black right activists such as Dr. Martin Luther King & El-Haj Malik El-Shabazz AKA Malcolm X who said, “You're not to be so blind with patriotism that you can't face reality. Wrong is wrong, no matter who does it or says it.”

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